"I've been drifting, and I haven't been drifting enough," Ender said. "I'm not used to being in one place for as long as I have been here, I'm not used to nothing changing on me, to having the same friends in the same fashion for such a long time. And to have that bother me is a flaw in me, but it's one I can't easily fix."

He glanced at her. "The idea of being happy in any permanent sense terrifies me more than anything."