Room 614, the Arms Hotel, Saturday lunchtime

[momslilassassin]

Turns out that waking up as a woman when your daughter is expecting you to be a man is not the most exhilirating start to a morning-now-heading-into-afternoon.

"Come on, Val," Ben soothed, rocking the sobbing infant as he paced the room for the thousandth time. "It's me. I still feel the same in the Force, I just...look different."

Perhaps philosophical discussions of gender and sex were not the place to start with a distraut one month old. "Ender?"

Comments

[momslilassassin]

Ben glanced down at Val again. "At least until she's old enough to be able to understand what's going on."

[endsthegame]

"So we might have to wait. Maybe even through last summer," Ender said.

Though Wiggins were quick to learn. He knew as much. "Are you okay with that?"

[momslilassassin]

"If it's a choice between being here and having our daughter in hysterics for a weekend, it's not really a choice," Ben murmured.

[endsthegame]

Ender kissed the back of his head. "I'm sorry."

[momslilassassin]

"It's not forever," Ben said, closing his eyes and leaning back against Ender. "It's just for now."

[endsthegame]

"We can invite people over when we get to Sorelledolce," Ender said softly. "It won't be the same, but..."

[momslilassassin]

Ben quickly wiped at his eyes, pretending he wasn't crying. "Sounds astral."

[endsthegame]

Ender slid his arms around Ben's waist - taking care not to jostle the baby. "No, it doesn't," he murmured.

Not to Ben, and 'astral' was far too strong a word for Ender's views on the situation.

[momslilassassin]

"It's stupid to be upset about this," Ben said, as Val started wailing at Ben's distress, "and it's just making her sadder."

[endsthegame]

Ender sighed. "Pretending to be happy isn't going to make you any less upset," he said, "Especially when she can sense you're upset whether you like it or not."

[momslilassassin]

"Force sensitivity is a pain," Ben said, tipping his head into Ender's neck and projecting as much calm as he could towards Val.

[endsthegame]

"A little bit," Ender agreed softly. He gave Ben a squeeze, concentrating on love and comfort, aimed at both of them.

[momslilassassin]

"I love you, too," Ben murmured, closing his eyes and soaking in the emotions.

[endsthegame]

"I love you both," Ender said softly. "Okay?"

[momslilassassin]

"Okay," Ben said, sniffling slightly.

[endsthegame]

"And you're allowed to be upset," Ender murmured. "We have to make compromises now. That's hard."

[momslilassassin]

Ben nodded. "It's the first one that's really stung, honestly."

[endsthegame]

"I'm sorry," Ender said softly. "We'll make it up to ourselves. Sometime."

[momslilassassin]

"I'm sure we will," Ben said. "Want to make a stop in Naboo on our way to the next spot?"

Because Ben needed to get grounded again.

[endsthegame]

"Sure," Ender said, smiling a little. "Get Val more time to get used to the house."

Which would be grounding for them as a family, too.

[momslilassassin]

Ben leaned in and kissed him, feeling familiar emotions under slightly unfamiliar lips. "Love you."

[endsthegame]

Ender kissed him back firmly; their different forms didn't make that any different - or less meaningful. "I love you, too," he said. "Whatever you need, Ben."

[momslilassassin]

Ben leaned in and rested his forehead against Ender's. "I'm so lucky to have you."

[endsthegame]

"Not any luckier than I am to have you, I assure you," Ender murmured. "And Val."

[momslilassassin]

"You have a cute nose this way," Ben said, kissing it.