Ben & Ender's bedroom, Shakespeare [Monday evening]

[momslilassassin]

It was old habit that led Ben to sit on asking Ender "what the hell was that?" about their meeting with Cade, their frankly terrifying and surly grandson, what the hell what the hell what the hell, until they were tucked into bed together.

"Soo..." he began. "What the hell was that?"

[OOC: For the boy!]

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[endsthegame]

"Please don't," Ender agreed. "We should probably visit Cade-- from time to time. I'd rather not reawaken his kneejerk 'shriek and run away' instincts."

[momslilassassin]

Ben nodded. "Or the drinking at breakfast time because he's talking to relatives thing."

[endsthegame]

Ender rubbed at Ben's arm again because it was better than rubbing at his forehead again; he was afraid he'd wear away the skin at this rate.

"We need to talk to your dad," he said finally.

[momslilassassin]

"Yeah," Ben said, kissing Ender on the worried wrinkles on his forehead. "That'll be a fun conversation."

[endsthegame]

"I get that he's focused," Ender said, "And often for good reason. I'd just rather he doesn't turn my grandchildren into alcoholics."

[momslilassassin]

"Me too," Ben said, sighing heavily. "Coruscant's back under Sith control. Can't be a great time to be a Jedi."

[endsthegame]

"No," Ender said. He stared up at the ceiling. "It doesn't surprise me at all we had kids stubborn enough to go back there anyway," he said quietly.

[momslilassassin]

"They'll double up on a sense of duty as well as the stubbornness," Ben murmured. "If things get bad--and it sounds like it does--of course they'd want to help."

He didn't voice the thought that had been bouncing around in his head: What about Val?

[endsthegame]

"It's ridiculous," Ender said, "I'm not exactly a father yet, but part of me is still hoping they didn't all go-- and that Bantha, ridiculous name and all, is doing okay."

[momslilassassin]

"Me too," Ben whispered, hugging Ender tightly. "It's strange--I've always been the furthest point on the family timeline, watching while Jaina and Anakin walk their paths and knowing at least how some of their choices will go. Now I'm where they are--wondering what horrible choice I made gets me a grandkid with tattoos and a major chip on his shoulder."

[endsthegame]

Ender sighed softly, hugging him back. "If there is some horrible mistake you made that leads directly into this, it won't be for decades yet," he said quietly. "We've talked about this - we're not in any place to have kids yet."

[momslilassassin]

"And yet we have a grandkid," Ben said. "Sort of."

[endsthegame]

"Talk about a sudden commitment," Ender joked weakly.

[momslilassassin]

Ben kissed his jaw. "I'm a little overwhelmed."

[endsthegame]

"I know," Ender said, giving him another squeeze. "That's why I tried to do most of the talking."

[momslilassassin]

"Which was noticed and appreciated," Ben replied softly. "Thank you."

[endsthegame]

"Hey," Ender said just as softly. "I love you. There isn't anyone else I'd want to have surprise grandchildren with."

[momslilassassin]

That got him a smile. "Same, kreetle. Even surly ones."

[endsthegame]

Ender kissed the top of Ben's head. "So out with it all," he murmured.

[momslilassassin]

"That makes it sound like I have a coherent thought on this yet," Ben said, closing his eyes, "and instead my brain's trying to give yours a run for its credits. How was our son such a terrible parent? How did he die? What was his name? When did the Sith take over? Was it Vestara? Is it because I'm here and not there? And on and on and on, all of it pointless."

[endsthegame]

"Maybe," Ender said, running his thumb back and forth over Ben's shoulder. "But I know from experience that sometimes it's better to let it out."

[momslilassassin]

"What are you thinking?" Ben asked softly. "This is our problem, not just mine."

[endsthegame]

"Honestly?" Ender said, glancing up at the ceiling. "I'm surprised by how freaked out I'm not. The first time... well, we both know what that did to me."

[momslilassassin]

"I remember," Ben said, linking his fingers through Ender's. "He didn't mention Val once," he murmured. "Think she stayed on this side?"

Because if she didn't exist at all, Ben would miss her terribly, hypothetical child or not.

[endsthegame]

Ender gave Ben's hand a squeeze. "It wouldn't surprise me if she did," he said. "She was bright."

And not quite as Skywalker-y as, say, Cade.